Thursday, 12 June 2014

Where I go from here......the spare room?

Bloomin' heck!  Retirement.....that's for old folk, right?  Well it seems its for me too, this big life changing new phase.  Grumpy Trousers has a three year head start on me so he's well happy with his routine.  That I'm about to disrupt!

I think he sees my retirement as having a hand-grenade chucked into his world.  He wasn't happy for a few days until we had 'the talk' about what adjustments both of us were having to make.  I don't relish the thought of being with him 24/7 any more than he does - in fact the thought of it makes me cranky and I am fighting the urge to be rather unpleasant to him.  That's so WRONG isn't it?  But if he will insist on closing the bedroom window on a humid, sticky night the results are me heating up like a furnace with hot flushing and becoming itchy, witchy and bitchy.  All at once!

(image nicked from

Since his triple heart bypass operation three years ago Grumpy Trousers body temperature is much lower than mine.  I have occasional resurgence of menopause symptoms so am always hot.  Therefore, closing a bedroom window on such a night was bound to have a negative effect. He can always burrow under the duvet, but I can't get any cooler even if I'm bloody buck naked!  I huffily flounced off into the spare room, almost tore the window from hits hinges to get some air in, then realised all his crap paperwork was on the bed.  With one sweep of my arm, it scattered all over the floor in order for me to throw myself on the bed.  I shouldn't have been so worked up but (now, is this familiar to you yet?) being overheated brings on hormonal headaches that bang inside my skull.  In hindsight, I should have given myself a cool sponge down in the bathroom, but hormonal headaches prevent me from thinking clearly.  So in the spare room I remained, with a bottle of water and my Kindle, eventually soothed by a cool caressing breeze that gently wafted the curtains and sent me to sleep.

Grumpy Trousers misses me sleeping alongside him far more than I miss him.  He takes comfort from my warmth; but unfortunately I don't take comfort from his snoring, coughing, wheezing, belching and farting that keep me awake.

This is all pointing to separate rooms isn't it?  I don't want it to come to that.  Occasionally is fine, but even I would hate it to become permanent.  I'll compromise on the belching and farting, and the snoring at a push, but the coughing and wheezing needs to be addressed.

Guess who will be the one to ring the doctor?


  1. Oh Linda, we have so much in common. I too have suggested that I sometimes sleep in the spare bedroom, because I am sometimes a night owl and I disturb him when I finally crawl into bed. I also get up really early, if I can't sleep and that disturbs him. Or, if I'm engrossed in a novel, I will read until the early hours. He wants to know when I am coming to bed and what I am doing, constantly.[ Partly Parkinsons and partly his personality.] This causes arguments with me swearing rather a lot. I won't be caged up, have never been and won't be now! Parkinsons or no bloody Parkinsons.
    But, my version of your Mr Grumpy also doesn't want me to sleep away from him. He doesn't miss my warmth...I'm usually quite cold. But, like you will be, we are together 24/7 and as much as I love him I NEED MY SPACE! I think it helps to keep relationships fresh and I love to spread myself out in bed.
    I am trying to get hubby to see that it can actually be quite romantic. Sometimes I may stray into his bed and he can come and visit me,in mine - if he isn't snoring his head off!
    Hubby is 13 years my senior and so he is well into retirement and happy to be retired. Just like you, I am not and never bloody well will be. I will prat about doing something until the day they put me in my wooden box.
    Good luck with getting him to the doctor. Mine won't go neither. Refuses to lose weight, along with me and healthy food is a dirty word. Stubborn, silly sods aren't they.
    I would recommend keeping busy. I would love to go out more, but that isn't always possible for me. I need to keep an eye on my silly sod, who takes silly risks and has had a few falls recently.
    My next project is to alter the bathroom to a wet room. I will have to sacrifice my beloved bath...sob, but hubby needs to be safe and I don't think he is, climbing in and out of the bath.

    We need to compare notes girl. xx

    1. Looks like we understand where the other is coming from don't we? I'm considering doing a post on Grumpy Trousers massive insecurities. It could turn into a right missive!

      And don't get me started on the stubbornness.......!!

    2. Yes, they're always right, aren't they? Not. x


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